I Don't........

A Warning to those easily offended..read no further.!!!

I Don't like change
I Don't sing
I Don't dance
I Don't want to be alone
I Don't want sympathy
I Don't like crowds
I Don't believe in God
I Don't fear death
I Don't like stupid people
I Don't like shaving
I Don't like my job
I Don't believe in Love anymore
I Don't think children should be medicated
I Don't like baggy pants
I Don't believe most people
I Don't take care of myself
I Don't speak my mind as much as I should
I Don't Listen to Reggae
I Don't like poor service
I Don't want to be with anybody
I Don't control my anger easily
I Don't believe in Luck
I Don't celebrate my Birthday
I Don't think most people are funny
I Don't want to fly Frontier airlines ever again
I Don't want to talk about it
I Don't care if anyone reads this or not
I Don't think "The Church" should interfere in politics in Utah
I Don't put much value on my life
I Don't believe in Heaven or Hell
I Don't feel anything
I Don't show emotion
I Don't like cold weather
I Don't enjoy Holidays
I Don't believe in Love at first sight
I Don't think golf is a sport
I Don't feel like making anyone laugh anymore

The Tricks of a Memory

Lately many of us (me included), have been posting notes on our facebook pages asking others to recall memories of us through the years, or perhaps silly things they know about us. We have all answered our fair share of questionaires, and we have all endured the skeletons emerging from our prospective closets. I wont post one of those. I am not sure what people remember about me is what I remember from childhood. Or growing up for that matter. Im sure I would get the obligatory "you made me laughs", and the " You were so funny" comments, and that is all good and well. But I thought in order to really clear the cobwebs I would write what I remember.

I have been feeling old lately. Not in the sense that my bones ache and my memory is shot. Just old. Weary. Tired. For some reason I have been thinking a lot about my youth and the years that bring me to who I am today. In reality what I am writing here is a confession. Knowing that, if you turn back now you will never be the wiser and you can continue to see me as you do now. However, if you are truly ready...let's begin.

I was born August 19, 1971. I have one sister and one brother (he came many years later). I have been told by my parents on numerous occasions I spoke for both my sister and myself always. It was later discovered she was deaf. Not 100% mind you, but deaf enough to not hear a normal conversation. I dont remember our first house, but I do remember the house my parents still live in. Being a new neighborhood, there were many homes being built around us. One day while exploring, my sister and I slid down the just dug foundation of the house behind us (just a big ol' dirt hole ya'all) and became trapped. It was fun sliding down Im sure. However we had to be rescued because we couldnt climb back out. It seemed like a good idea at the time. I also remember the neighbor boy (david sperry, in fact) running around and falling in a hole in the ground. Inside that hole was a broken piece of clay pipe and it cut his leg darn near from ankle to knee cap. Those were the early years. Eventually all the holes were filled and more and more people moved in. Many still live there today.

As I grew older one thing about me never changed. My red hair. At first I saw nothing bad about this (I dont now either), but I later learned to despise it. Throughout Jr and Sr High School I was called "carrott top", "Duracell (copper top...get it??), and I heard all the fun time chants like " I would rather be dead than red in the head". So many clever people...I wonder what most are doing now? My elementary years were just as fun though without the chants and name calling. My second grade teacher introduced me to child abuse. I guess as I look back now I realise that even then I was too smart for my own good. I would finish my assignments in class sooner than the others, and being done and bored would proceed to goof off. This didnt bode well with my teacher. He started by locking me in the classroom closet to prevent me from disrupting class. When that didnt work (even then I was a master at mischief), he began to quiet me in other ways. If I finsihed early I was instructed to lay my head acoss my desk and be quiet...only then that gave him the chance to push my desk forward and slam my fingers between it and the desk in front of me. Thinking it was me causing the problems in class, my parents resorted to having a friend of my dads come in complete police uniform to speak with me about juvenile delinquency. I was even placed in resource. I felt like an instant outcast. I felt like I was bad. When it was discovered what was truly going on...well Mr Tolman doesnt teach school anymore. The next year I found J.R.R. Tolkien, I was removed from resource and I learned to play chess. All thanks to a wonderful librarian who saw more than a disruptive child in me.

The rest of elementary school went as it should. I found and lost friends. I sold cookies for the P.T.A, and I played marbles at recess. In 1983, I started Jr High School at Valley. It was a short walk from my house and the freedom was wonderful. On registration day I knew few people. I had no idea what a locker was. I also met my best friend and brother that day. This skinny little blonde haired boy walked up to me and asked "you got a locker partner yet?" I said "naw...you?"...well the rest is history. I lockered with that skinny little blonde haired kid for six years. our first year in Jr high was rough. New classes, new teachers, and bullies. Being as skinny as he was, he was a constant target both in class and out. I protected him when I could, but I couldnt stop him from getting his leg ripped open by a pair of track cleats. It happened in gym class day. One of our classmates had just finished running track and joined us for soccer. He kicked the ball and missed...taking the right leg of my new best friend right to the bone. He still has the ghostly scar as a reminder. Thanks for everything Veigh.

I soon graduated and went to High School. Im sure you know where too. If not I will tell you. Granger High. Fresh out of Jr High and lookin to be the big dogs. I went from thinking I knew something to quickly realising I knew nothing. The teasing and tormenting of me because of my red hair had started early on in seventh grade, so it was no surprise that it continued into the tenth. I was both physically and mentally happy that some of the jerks from Jr High had chosen to go to Taylorsville instead. I thought it would be different. It wasnt. One person in particular had it in for me. I wont mention names because he knows who he is. Thats all that matters. This boy would shove me, trip me, push me into the girls locker room (sorry ladies...I swear I remember nothing), and because by then I was wearing glasses, he would lick his fingers and wipe them across my glasses. It was both frustrating and aggrivating. I was always taught growing up that fighting was not an option. In reality, I was never taught to fight. I accepted my role in the hierarchy of the High School Dogma. I was noone. To that point I had actually been a rather quiet and reserved person. Sure I had the occasional outburst of humor, but nothing compared to my later years. It was then that I snapped...I changed...I morphed into a acne faced kid with red hair who just no longer gave a damn. I spouted off whenever I could. I mimicked and goofed off. I held nothing back. My humor became my best defense weapon. It was my shield, and later my sword. I called our rotund spanish teacher "NORM !!!". I told my art teacher that painting upside down was like peeing backwards...it made no sense ( I was shortly removed from the painting class). The bullying didnt stop...it just didnt bother me anymore. They would call me "Copper top", and I would respond with something equally as clever and earn a butt kicking or a punch in the arm. I disrupted classes...I made teachers sigh when my name showed up on the class register...I lived to make people laugh.

Now some of you reading this were in some of my classes. I also remember some of you giving me nasty looks when I screwed around. I dont blame you. You were there to learn, and I was there for....I look back now and realise I spent three years screwing around. I did some dumb things. I pulled some crazy stunts. All for a laugh. To those of you I may have offended...I apologize. To those of you that laughed...I thank you. I guess what Im trying to say is this...In all honesty, my High School years sucked. I had few friends. I had dates, but I was not popular. I looked at my yearbook the other day and was saddened by the fact that most of the signatures were from schoolmates younger than me. I took no time to get to know those my own age. I know some of you now better in the last year than I knew you then. Some of you I have never talked to, others I have thought about over the years and wondered about. Even the kids I grew up with in my own neighborhood terrorized me and therefore did not sign my yearbook either. It was like second grade all over again...I felt like an outcast. Im not saying I do now.

Since High School, I fell in love and was burned. I had a son and never saw him again. I have been stabbed and hit by a rapidly moving vehicle. I have scars...both the physical and mental kind. I didnt have a productive childhood. I didnt play sports because I didnt want to ask my parents for the money to do so. I always felt like a third wheel around some of my friends. In hindsight...I can see now why I tend to keep to myself. I dont go out often. I dont talk to many people. Its the biggest reason I find moving to California so comforting. I dont know anyone there so I would not be forced to perform. I can be myself...whoever that is. Dont worry about me...dont feel bad either. Im alive and my heart is filled now. I have a purpose in life and I regret little. My childhood bullies have all grown up and with any luck have children who are being bullied.

Peace Love and Happiness to you all.

Happy Valentine's Day

Its been some time since I last wrote in here, so I thought I would leave a quick message. Nothing special, just wanted to wish my loyal readers a very Happy Valentine's Day.

On the radio today they were talking about the big day when cupid aims and shoots. According to the latest records there were 1.6 million roses bought this year. Not bad in this economy. Of that total 97% of those were red. Of that total 60% were produced in California. Thats good to know for me. I will know where to look next year. Now before you wonder what I meant by that, let me explain. I was set and ready to send my beloved roses..it didn't happen the way I would have liked it to. You see, my dearest went to Puerto Rico and there was to be noone home to recieve them. It's ok really. She had the chance to go somewhere she has not been and I would never deny her that. She deserved the rest. I hope she had a great time.

Now they were also discussing the top ten romantic movies and according to rental and other useless data they are (in no particular order) Titanic, Love Actually, Bridget Jones Diary, Pretty Woman, Four Weddings and a Funeral, Definitely Maybe, and a few others I cannot remember. Doesn't matter really...you watch what you want to watch. You enjoy what you want to enjoy. I don't honestly think what people rent or like should in anyway determine what I do. Im not saying Im not interested...Im always interested in the habits of others.

I was thinking and wondering about a few things. Do you curl up with the one you love and spend the day as a couple? Do you go out of your way one day a year to show them you love them above all else? Have your ideas of romance changed since you were younger? Is there a special song you play for just them? Do you have cute little nicknames for each other. Jackie and I do...She is my everything..my better half, my equal, my one true love and I am her Dork. It makes me smile to hear her call me that. What do you call your significant other?

One other thing I was curious about was this...when you were the age your children are now, did you decorate a shoebox for Valentine's Day? Did you ever go home empty handed? I remember the shoe boxes, but thats about it. I can't honestly remember if I ever went home without a Valentine. I doubt it...Im very lovable and cute as a button. Who wouldn't want to give me one?

Well anyway...I hope this made you stop and think. I hope you turn to your other half and tell them with utmost sincerity " See, you could've been a dork". No seriously, I wish you all the very happiest and most romantic of Valentines Day. I hope you kiss that special someone in your life and count yourself lucky to have them. I waited very long for mine and I'm not letting go.

All my best to you all

Brandon

P.S. I Love You Sweetheart

20 Years Ago

I was burning some music for my sister the other day (yes, I can be nice once in a while), and it got me thinking. You see, the music I was burning for her was Kenny Rogers Greatest Hits. There is one of his songs I happen to like ( ok, there is more than one), and it is titled "Twenty Years Ago". Part of the lyrics say "Life was so much easier, twenty years ago". I dont think it matters what decade you were born in or what happened twnety years ago, but I believe this holds true for most if not all of us. So I thought today we would discuss what happened to us twenty years ago.

Twenty years ago a Flock of Seagulls ran (they ran so far away), Madonna wasnt married and she was doing the Vogue. Johnny hated jazz, Frankie went to Hollywood, and Prince sang under a Purple Rain. Men Without Hats popped the world, Motley Crue took the world by storm with headbanging, thrashin metal, and Bon Jovi set a fashion trend with ankle length trench coats. There was The Cure, The Femmes were violent, Duran Duran was Notorious, and Girls Just Wanted to Have Fun. Boys to Men sang to us without instruments, Marky Mark became funky, and the New Kids on the Block had the Right Stuff.

The 80's brought us the best decade of music and trends. Garbage Pail Kids were the thing, and Thundercats saved the day every Saturday afternoon. He Man was the master of the Universe, Papa was smurftastic, and MTV debuted to millions of kids with nothing to do but sit in front of the tv for hours waiting for Thriller to come on again. We watched in amazement as Dire Straits got their Money for Nothin (and their chicks for free), and we all came together as one on January 28, 1986 when the Space Shuttle Challenger fell apart just after takeoff. We went through puberty, lost and gained friends, learned to drive, started dating, got our first kiss, fell in love, and for many of us, went on missions.

Now i cant and dont claim the 80's was the best decade for all. I have spoken with some who not only hated, but despised their high school life. We were all different then. Friends I have today I only knew briefly then. Friends I had then, I have fallen out of touch with or have lost. Things change, time changes and so do people. I was a geek in high school. I wore glasses, tried very hard to fit in with a crowd, and kept all my classes laughing with my never ending banter and witty humor. I sometimes look back and wonder... if I could do it all again would I change anything? Yes and no.

The 80's brought us some great movies too. The Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink, Howard the Duck (ok, not ALL the movies were great), License to Drive, Lost Boys, 16 Candles, and many others. We learned how to fit in, how to dress, how to dance and how to love from many of these.

The last twenty years has seen changes in all of us. We grew up, some of us grew out, we got married and started raising familes. We learned that a job isnt just something to make money at, we survive now by what we do and dont do. We learned what our parents said when they cursed us with " I hope someday your child is just like you!", and for some of us we learned the heartbreak of loss and divorce. Twenty years can bring a lot of change.

When you think back twenty years ago, what do you think of? What music do you still enjoy from then? What movies or God forbid, fashion trends? Do you tell your children of the "good ole days"? Do your kids wonder if Dinosaurs were around when we were younger (like we did for our parents)? What song was your first slow dance to? What song was playing when you got your first kiss? Do you remember games like "7 seconds in Heaven"? Did you have poofy, teased out hair (dont forget, I have yearbook photos of you all...I know)? Did you find spandex like tooootally tubular? Did you ever say, like gag me with a spoon? Do tell, do tell. Enquiring minds want to know. Anything you remember would be wonderful to read.

As we start a new year, I look forward to my life more than I have of late. I now have someone wonderful in it. She brings me the joy, love and good times I have been missing out on. I also look forward to my ...cough cough...twenty year reunion. There are so many of you I long to see again. I have grown closer to many of you since high school, and have made better friends of you I did know then. The planning committee is a wonderful one and I know it will be a fantastic time. And if youre reading this Kamie, Im still doing what I can to track down lost Lancers...dont fire me yet.

So spill the beans, tell us what we want to read. Make this your own confession page. I look forward to all of it...and I cant promise it wont be used against you.

Be good to everyone you meet...be better to people you like, and remember...a broken clock is correct twice daily.

Until we speak again................. Brandon

Christmas Wish

I'm back. I'm sitting here with mixed emotions...there are a couple routes I could take here. I decided on this one. Today I would like to talk about Christmas. Not far out of the ordinary, especially after the last post, but bear with me folks. You see its like this. Everyday my day begins the same. I get up, I get dressed ( I shower at night for those of you holding your noses), I go to work. Once I get to work I put my steel toed butt kickers on (work boots), I dress all warm and fuzzy and I turn on the Mp3 player. I start off everyday the same way. At first I tune to 98.7 and listen to the entertainment news and the daily celebrity challenge ( I have won several times). After all of this has ended I turn to KBER 101 for my daily dose of Bob and Tom. Lately though, I find my routine taking a different course. For the last few weeks B98.7 has been doing what they call the Christmas Wish. I find it both remarkable and incredible what they do and have done with this program. They recieve hundreds of letters and emails about people in need. These are often written by family members, but have been known to be written by neighbors or even people they work with. The letters themselves are very warm and heartening. After the letters have been read, they choose a family to visit every day until the day the jolly fat man visits. This is where i really pay attention. Im not a softie, so you can stop now with the awwws and the ooohhhss. I truly believe though that they have hit it on the head with this program. There is a group of people that show up in the early morning hours fighting the cold and often the elements to make a wish come true for a different family each day. The gifts are always different and the letters are never alike, but the meaning is there. The Christmas Wish is sponsored by Kurt Benson Motors. This man has done a wonderful thing. Shawn Stevens is the radio personality responsible for entering the houses and wishing the families a Merry Christmas. He really gets into it. His emotions are true and his message is the same ..."Pass it on". There have been families who have disabled children. Parents out of work and worried about Christmas for their children. A single father with several children who had recently lost his wife to cancer. These are all people deserving of this program. I applaud this radio station for taking the time and the energy needed to see this through each year.

They of course are not the only ones. Today I heard a story about two girls in West Jordan. These girls are 8 and 9, and have for the past couple of years set up cardboard boxes in different locations to collect clothing, toys, food and cash to help the homeless and those living in shelters. Well done little angels.

One of our own ( I wont name a name) along with her brood of elves has done a wonderful job making blankets. Kitty blankets to be exact. These will be used for new kitty's adopted at the animal shelter. She has not only done a service for the community but shown her children the art of unselfishness. Wonderful!!

Rupert, the old guy that never could win survivor, has started a charity called Rupert's Kids. He takes donations, items that can be used or auctioned off, and clothing and uses it to support a camp for children. These kids are getting a summer experience they wouldnt otherwise get. I know this isnt exactly Christmas, but he does a wonderful service and he deserves a little recogniton.

Finally, but only barely, The Angel Tree. This is a program sponsored by KUTV and has been going for many years. Its simple, you pick a child from the Angel Tree and grant their wish. Most times these are small items..a pair of gloves, shoes, maybe a coat. Toys are not uncommon, and books are always wanted as well. Its a simple thing, and it rarely costs much. I know in todays economy times are tough. I understand all to well being strapped for cash. I have done the Angel Tree for five years now, and couldnt see breaking tradition this year. I picked a little girl who needed a new backpack. I hope she likes Dora the Explorer. You can find the Angel Tree at any Macy's location or any branch of Cypres Credit Union. This program is also sponsored by The Salvation Army.

I dont know how many of you recieved a letter in your inbox about a coat drive for the Granger High School Alumni Association, but I would like to take these last few sentences to ask you to please consider helping. There are teenagers and other kids out there with no means of staying warm in the winter. We all know (those of us that went to Granger) that some of those classrooms are always cold. There were others that were always hot too. But thats neither here nor there....this is a valid attempt at clothing those who need it. Please look through your old coats and mittens. Got any old BYU stocking hats laying around that even the dog wont wear?? How about an old 49'ers coat that you cant wear out of embarassment? Anything will help and everything is appreciated.

The coat/clothing drive info is..Contact: Brent Newton, 801 957-1779; Brent1966@aol.com

I hope I didnt come off as preaching there folks. I know you all have families and I know you all work hard to stay ahead. I only ask that at this time of year we all remember the true meaning and the true spirit of the holiday by helping our fellow man in any way possible. I would like to end with a heartfelt thank you and and warmest holiday wish to all the men and women serving in todays armed forces. Overseas or at home...doesnt matter. They have given the ultimate sacrifice for our freedom and liberties. Its a debt of gratitude that can never be repayed.

I wish you all the best life can bring you. Be good to yourselves and others. Throw snowballs at those you dont like, and remember....please dont eat the yellow snow.

Until next time...Brandon

Holidays

Ok, so its been awhile and I havent written anything in here. I thought today we would discuss the Holidays. What they mean to us (other than the obvious "family" reason), and what some of our traditions are. The Holidays mean extra time off for me. They also mean a chance to spend time with or see people you havent seen in like forver. I know to some the idea of time off from work and the daily routine sounds rather selfish. Youre right, it is. I wouldnt say I have the hardest job in the world, but it is definitely a physical demand daily, and the idea of sitting on my butt typing a blog is much more appealing than getting up at 430 in the morning for work.

There is also the seeing people part. When I say this I typically mean relatives. Im not especially close to my father's side of the family. I have some wonderful cousins and some very nice aunts and uncles, its just not a "lets get together every chance we get" type of family. Recently my Grandfather died, and I had the opportunity to see many if not all of this side of the family. Uncles who live in Vegas and Texas came up and it was a brief time for re-connection. I saw two cousins I hadnt seen since they were 3 and 5...they are both now in college and one is taller than I am. It was a sad time for the family, but a joyous one as well.

So now, as far as seeing people, I guess you could say Ive done my one turn for the year. Im sure there are Christmas parties and other gatherings, I just usually choose not to attend. I have noone to blame but myself, and Im ok with that. What Im really loking forward to this year is the seeing that someone special in my life. For the last many many years, there has been noone to spend the Holiday with. That all changes this year. Im looking very forward to spending some time and much needed rest and relaxation with Jackie. This will be my first year away from home on the Holiday, but again, Im ok with that. Jackie and I are planning on spending Christmas and the few days following in Las Vegas. I love Las Vegas and everything about it. The up all night atmosphere, the never closes vibe. I could live there. Its warm and the people arent so uptight about smoking in public.

I cant wait to see Jackie again. It seems like forever ago since we last saw each other, but in reality its been mere weeks. I wont howver have the chance to spend time with the kids. They are all going back to Chicago to be with their Dad or Grandparents. Michael (the second oldest) is going to China with his school roommate. Its just her and I. I hate not being able to see the kids though. The little buggers have grown on me like a fungus or mold. I look forward to spending even the smallest of minutes with them. Bonding, having fun, you know...being like a parent. The whole idea scares the royal hell out of me. I dont consider myself a good role model, nor do I look at myself as a postive parental figure. I dont treat the children as my own as Jackie and I agreed its better for them to get used to our realtionship and grow accustomed to it first. Right now the relationship between me and the kids is more of a friendly nature. Give it time.

So now that I have wandered, I will actually go into the whole question behind this particular blog. The Holidays. Now I have already told you what they mean to me, and now I would like to discuss the traditons. My mom has a tradition of giving one present every year on Christmas Eve. It is usually a new pair of pajamas. As I have grown older, the gift has changed. It started when I was younger as footed (or is it feeted) pj's to more along the adult line...pants and a t shirt. As the gift has progressed, so have I. I have gone from wearing the cute adorable pj's with the Hulk or the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers to more along the lines of just the bottoms. Most times not even that. I now have a rather wonderful collection of pj bottoms that come in very handy after working all day. There is nothing better in my mind than lounging around the house on a cold Saturday afternoon in a pair of flannel bottoms, my Motley Crue tshirt and a nice hot cup of coffee.

That is really the only tradition we have. We get up, make a mess of the family room, clean up the mess, comment on gifts given and eat a nice homemade breakfast. I have been volunteered as I have grown older to cook part of that breakfast, and I gladly do so. Its not much, but it brings everyone closer together for one day.

So now I would like to know what your traditons are. What do the holidays mean to you. Is it stress, worry, financial ruin? Could it be knowing you have your loved ones around? Is it just a nice relaxing day off work? You tell us gentle reader.

I will continue to write my blogs now that I have a new computer. I downloaded something and ended up with a nasty hacker virus that destroyed my old one. Jackie gave me my Christmas early and sent me my new wonderful puter. You all have her to thank for my new batch of ramblings and posts. I know I do. Thank you so much honey, I truly do love you.

I wish you all the best of the best and the happiest of happy. I pray your Holidays are without incident and add to your fondest memories. I have missed you all, and look forward to reconnecting to you once again.

Until the next post.....Feliz Navidad, Vesele Vanoce (Bohemian), Mele Kalikimaka, Shub Naya Baras (Hindi), Sung Tan Chuk Ha (Korean), Saint Dan Fai Lok (Cantonese), and of course Merry Christmas.

Brandon Claus

Update

Ok, so I have received requests for an update on my current status of non singleness. Well, here it is. I'm still not single. Simple and to the point right??

Jackie and I are doing wonderfully. We have spent three weekends together so far, and I have had the opportunity to meet all the kids. I can't say that I blame them, but the kids love me. What's not to love? We have spent the last month plus getting to know one another, and finding out all we can about each other. At this point in time, she knows that I am awesome, funny (funnier than her according to the above mentioned children), romantic, sweet, handsome (her word, not mine), and an all around good guy. I now know that she is not only intelligent (as I stated in a previous blog), but she is also kind, warm, funny (not as funny as me though remember?), attentive, giving, beautiful, spontaneous, accepting, patient, and the most important part of my life. I can honestly say without a doubt that I have fallen in love. Fallen so hard that is stuck to me. Jackie has become the person I sought. She has taught me so much and left me yearning to learn more.
I know that when I first mentioned I had met someone, there were many posted congrats. I thank you all. I can now say that when I see how happy you all are with your husbands/wives, I honestly understand what it is you see. I have been far too long in the dark, searching without a light, and then suddenly the clouds parted. Jackie and I have so very much in common. We have our bad times as every relationship does. I ensure her it only strengthens us. I now know what it is to truly miss someone's company.
We have talked at length of me moving to California to be closer to her and the kids. She has no desire to move to Utah, and I don't blame her. Besides, she has a pool. But don't worry, the move will not be immediate. I have some loose ends to tie up here first. And I'm positive they get facebook in California too. Don't worry folks, I'm yours for a bit longer.
Well there it is...the update asked for. It is unusual for me, but I smile more lately. My stress has diminished and my anger doesn't surface as easily. I cannot wait for her to meet you all, and have already mentioned the reunion to her. I will still fulfill my duties to the reunion committee and will still peek in on your blogs every so often. I share your happiness for me, and thank you all again for your encouraging words and your pats on the back. I hope life is finding you all well, happy and full of fire. Remember to please be kind and rewind.

Brandon